HI Everyone!!! Just figuring out how picture blogging works! Took long enough.

Finding the pathway.

I find the older I get the easier it is to see flaws in others and potential lessons to learn. It seems whenever I get ahead of myself and humbleness takes a backseat, I relive what I had laughed at. "I can't believe they can't do that." "I can do that better than them." It's embarassing to admit that I think this to myself when someone is not getting it as easily as myself. Whatever they were struggling with, I seem to be in the same position. It is amazing to feel one with the world, the giant, messy cycle of it all and the nothing that gives it a chance to thrive. Feeling in the philosophical mood, i decided to post this. If there really is a life after this, how will we use our time? Creating families, or becoming a learned scholar, or not worrying. What will we take with us and what will we leave behind. As a goal for myself, I want to leave behind empty space. I want to leave behind the negative energy that ways one down. But how does one potentially move forward? Forward is sooooo subjective, even happy feelings can be caused by consuming something we know isn't good for us. Whatever it is, I hope you find it and it brings you a good turn.

A Long Awaited Trip and New Workout

Nana and Grampy are finally coming. We are ecstatic. And I will be excercising my new driving privilages by taking Gramp to Barnes and Noble in Orem. I got a 95%! Which is good enough for me. If only I could sufficiently park uphill. Oh, well, you can't be perfect at everything. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WINNIE! I can't believe she's already two. Also, I have just bought this product called P90X that I am starting next week. I am still a bit apprehensive because they are intense workouts, but that is why I'm blogging about it. It will leave me no choice but to suck it up and actually get off the couch with my free time.

Driving Miss Crazy

It's finally happening. I am planning on getting my drivers license. Two years too late. Rest assured that it is not due to my lack of safe driving, but my ongoing talent for procrastination. Monday is the test, and as long as I can back out all right, everything will go according to plan. Backing up 100 feet has been somewhat of a hassle because I'm only 4'11''. On a side note Happy BIrthday Grampy on the 1st!!!

And So It Begins...

Okay gang, although AP English was a bust, AP Statistics is now in progress. I am also taking Anatomy and Physiology for all my medical buffs and Psychology for all you lovable screwups. In my opinion I can definetly sell the line "And how do you feel about that?" Those who are bummed about AP English, don't worry I probably will still take the test, I just am taking the secret way in. Thanks for the comments by the way, although I've only been at school for 4 days, it feels like an eternity!!! Love ya' all.

Impending Doom or just Senior Year???

I hear the second hand ticking at an alarming rate. Two days. Such an amazing summer, with visits from our long missed family members; but I can't help but feel a sick churning in my stomach. AP classes are the spawn of satan himself. A question is now lodged within the confines of my mind: Why am I taking AP Statistics and AP English Lit.? If anyone could answer, it would be much obliged.

Catch you if you can.

In such a crazy and hectic life, I can hardly catch my step, I am sure that this is how it goes for all of us. Yet, I wonder if some even care. Reuniting with my beautiful family brought me to a new realization. None of them truly know me. Even those who have lived with me for these last 17 years. It is almost hilarious to think that this is even possible. When contemplating over these thoughts, I didn't know whether this was because they didn't want to know the real me or if they just believed I was a sweet teenager that dreams of finding the perfect mate, wedding and for the time being getting the perfect tan. This, even though it sounds "wonderful" brings no joy to me. I find you uncover things when you do not look for them. Yes, I'd love to be in love and have the sound of pitter patter of little feet on the hardwood floor. Just not right now.

They don't know I dream of the ocean and miss the sound of rain on the roof. They don't have a clue that I crave Classic books, M. Night Shayamalan movies and Imogen Heap music. They are unaware of how much I hate this little town I live in, but stay for the them. They don't even know how much I LOVE them even though they don't know these things. Ironic.

Letting the Dust Settle

As the school year winds down, life has brought on new promises. I am extatic to find what new doors are waiting to be opened! There is hope in a job proposition I have found and I have plans on working on nothing but art this summer! It's a great feeling to be done with this year, it was tough, but worth it. I definitely learned a few things about me, my family, and my friends. This is my formal way of thanking them all for the love and support they showed me when the bad days rolled in. I know I would not be what I am today without your persistant guidance (and occasional nagging) and you deserve the credit for making me a more patient and understanding person. (not the easiest feat, I'll admit) So here's to you, I love 'ya dearly and hope to grow by your sides for many wonderful years to come!

Grand Opening!

Welcome to this new expiremental blog! This is personally exciting to start my own blog, (which is somewhat depressing) I've decided it was about time to publish my life and its extremely intricate works. There are many cogs in the machine, which you'll have to bear with me. Hopefully this will be a pleasant experience with a posotive outcome!